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Author: FancyFigures
see part 1 for warnings, notes, disclaimer
True
Colours
+ Part 9
Quatre nursed an ice-cold beer
that had brought tears of surprise to his eyes when he drank from it.
It was refreshingly good. He sat fairly comfortably in a booth at the
back of the bar, with Trowa Barton half a foot away, sat beside him. He'd
offered for Trowa to call him Quatre - but he'd not been offered the friendly
gesture in return.
"So - what did you want to talk to me about, Quatre?"
Quatre felt the reins of control slipping out from fingers that he'd always
thought were pretty strong. His fingers - his control. Trowa Barton
was that unusual person - someone who didn't immediately fawn over Quatre
Winner, and was unfazed by his money, his sophistication, and - most especially
- his facile wit.
"I need to talk to you about something - to ask for confirmation about
things that you know, and I don't. Because..." Quatre paused. His fingers
ran slowly down his beer bottle, wiping the condensation on to the tabletop.
"Because you knew Solo Maxwell."
Trowa's eyes flashed suddenly, and his hands tightened on the table as
if he braced himself to rise.
"Hold on," said Quatre, softly. "Hear me out. I know you were his lover
-"
"And he was mine," said Trowa, his voice a thread of strain. He spoke
to no-one about Solo - no-one except Duo.
"Yes," said Quatre. "And he was yours. I understand that."
Trowa looked at him, a little more closely than before. Something about
his tone was sincere - something that made Trowa consider overlooking
the shockingly good looks and the affected mannerisms; that made him listen
to the man beneath.
"What's it to do with you, Quatre? Did you know him?" His voice was calm
and low - but it was as sharp as if he'd shouted in violent anger.
"A little. I own racetracks that he used to visit - I knew of his lifestyle."
Trowa appeared to have relaxed back on to his seat - so Quatre pressed
on. "And whilst I understand that you two were lovers, I know that he
was also seeing another person at the time of his death." The gorgeous
green eyes snapped up to meet his - he was surprised at how disturbed
he was, seeing the pain in them.
But Trowa's voice was still calm. "So did I, Quatre. I always knew whom
he was with. So what?"
Quatre sighed. He wondered if he would get the chance of another drink
with this man - he decided to make his first one last as long as he could.
"I want some information about it - about that person - and I know no-one
else to ask."
Trowa seemed to weigh up the situation, like he had when he first met
Quatre. The blond man watched the way his mouth pursed; the way he laid
his hands gently on the table, fingers long and outstretched. "Does it
concern Duo?"
"It concerns Heero Yuy. You know that they -?"
Trowa nodded, curtly. "But Duo?"
" - and therefore Duo as well," finished Quatre, determined to regain
some advantage.
"I won't have Duo hurt," Trowa stated.
"I don't want either you or Duo disturbed, Mr Barton," said Quatre, slowly.
"I don't want to stir up painful memories for you -"
"I don't matter."
"But of course you do, for God's sake!" retorted Quatre. They stared at
each other for a moment. Behind the bar, in amongst the babble and laughter
of the other customers, Marty looked over at the booth, wondering when
to offer more drinks. He saw the tension in the two bodies sat there.
He turned back to polishing the glasses.
Trowa's eyes dropped away from the irritated blue gaze opposite him. He
nudged his empty bottle and drummed his fingers against it.
"Talk then, Quatre."
Quatre bit back the exclamation of surprise that rose to his lips. "Thank
you, Mr Barton. I appreciate that."
Trowa leant back in his seat as if he was preparing for a long session,
and he suddenly smiled. Quatre - like many before him - was astonished
at the beauty and warmth of that smile. "Call me Trowa," he said. "And
the next round is on you!"
+
Those two are still talking! thought Marty. It was a damned surprise
- he'd thought at that early stage that Barton would walk out. He knew
the guy - he knew that tightness in his body; the set of his chin when
he was angry. He rarely shouted - he never caused any trouble at all in
the bar. But Marty had seen him angry with the kid - and he'd seen him
so low that he'd been afraid to leave the bar, even for a minute, in case
Barton left and he never saw him again. Marty wasn't one of your jovial,
fatherly types of bar owner, but he was fond of Barton. His opinion had
often been that the kid needed a good slapping, but Barton was a man carrying
a heap of misery - he deserved better.
So there'd been that awkward moment between Barton and his mystery friend
- then Barton had relaxed a bit, and the two of 'em had talked seriously
for twenty minutes or more. Then the mood had eased again, and it seemed
they'd got their business done, and were just two guys chatting over a
beer. The blond one looked like a good talker. He kept Barton's attention
well - he rarely took his eyes off 'im in return. And Marty liked the
way that Barton had been smiling. He'd been smiling a heap of a lot this
evening.
Marty knew the blond guy was someone different - there was money there;
an arrogant, pampered type. A type that didn't often sit in Marty's bar
with its feet up on a stool and stand its turn at the bar for an hour
or more. And he didn't know many who'd tip quite so generously; in Marty's
experience, those who had the riches, held on to 'em!
"You'll have another?" asked Quatre, gesturing at Trowa's empty bottle.
"Marty keeps lookin' over like he thinks I might mug you for your wallet,
or steal the non-matchin' glassware."
Trowa smiled slightly. Quatre noted - again - the attractive way that
his mouth creased at the corners. Christ, but this man oughtta get happy
more often! He wondered what brand this damned beer was - he seemed to
feel just a little intoxicated tonight.
"We finished discussing your business a long time ago, Quatre. Don't you
want to be off somewhere else?"
"No," said Quatre, rather too quickly. "Blame my curiosity - though Goddamit,
it's all but jaded nowadays. But I'm enjoyin' talkin' to you, Trowa. It's
good to meet someone who knows the artist boy."
"You've known Heero for a long time? What's your opinion of his relationship
with Duo?"
"Uh-huh. A long time. I'm pleased he's seeing Duo - of course I
am. Guess I'm hopin' he knows what he's doing, though. For both their
sakes. There's a need there for each other - but there still seems to
be some kinda barrier... " He laughed softly. "Guess I hope he's not too
jaded himself to recognise what he wants and to go for it."
"No..." said Trowa, slowly. "It's more than that. Duo is resisting it
as well. He hasn't ever given his deepest affection to anyone except Solo.
Solo was all he needed; all he relied on. Then life knocked him back too
much, too young. He's mislaid his one talent - lost his one anchor. He's
a mess of guilt about Solo..."
"But Heero likes him a hell of a lot."
Trowa paused to think about his reply. Quatre liked that in a man; it
was one reason he got on with Heero Yuy so well.
"Yes - I can believe that. And he likes Heero, probably just as much -
when he lets himself. But for Heero - is that all there is?"
Quatre sighed. "Heero has never given his deepest affection, period. This
is a wild and scary time for him - he's not used to anything where he
isn't in control. Where he can't plan or anticipate the outcome."
Trowa wondered briefly why he was sharing so many of his personal thoughts
and opinions - it was a rare thing for him to do. "I think it's because
of Heero that Duo is drawing again. It's opening him up - socialising
him again. That's so good for him. I welcome it."
Quatre saw the effort that it took for Trowa to admit that. To admit other
devotion into his precious Duo's life; to consider it all objectively.
Trowa Barton was a scarily honest person!
"You care a lot for him, Trowa," he said, carefully. "Strikes me you'd
kill for him - but you won't live his life for him. Hey - that's how a
true friend should be!"
"You're a lot sharper than you like people to believe, Quatre Winner,
" said Trowa, gently.
"You're one of the better knives in the box y'self," came Quatre's quick
response.
They stared at each other, until Trowa lifted an arm to call Marty for
another beer, and broke the mood.
+
"So... you wanna do dinner some time, Trowa?" said Quatre, in his lazy
drawl. He leant forward so slightly that only Trowa would have noticed.
"No strings attached..."
"You can drop the act, Quatre," smiled Trowa. "It does nothing for me."
"I can see that," replied Quatre. "Maybe you'll let me know sometime just
what does."
Trowa stared at his blatant approach, as if amazed that he'd try it. But
something about Quatre's frank look made him bite back the sharp response
he'd been considering. Something that made him want to smile, instead,
with genuine amusement. Astonishing!
"A drink, then, maybe? Another day, another place?" Quatre persisted.
Trowa meant to say 'no' immediately. He'd said 'no' to an offer or two
in the last six months, and always meant it.
"I don't date," were the words that he actually said.
"And I don't ask very often," came Quatre's amused reply. "They usually
come to me if I want 'em." In his soft, seductive voice it didn't sound
so dreadfully arrogant. "You're safe from me, Trowa Barton - if that's
what you want!"
Trowa did laugh, then. Quatre exulted in the rich smile - the way the
man's face lit up. "I'm not scared of you, Quatre Winner -!"
"No, hon, I know. I think I'm scared of you..."
"Ridiculous!" scorned Trowa.
"Uh-huh," agreed Quatre. "It is. But you're an unusual, attractive man,
Trowa. I think anyone would be a damned fool not to be faithful to you
-"
Quatre knew at once that he shouldn't have said it, even before he saw
Trowa flinch. Of course he could see that Trowa Barton was a very private
person - what the hell had possessed him to practise his frivolous banter
on him? He was private - and very controlled. God knows what he'd be like
if he let that control go a little...
"And you, Quatre? How are you with your lovers?" The response came
back very quickly - but the tone was very cool.
"Mine?" Quatre sighed. He didn't know whether he'd been scolded or scorned
for his clumsy remarks. But he'd answer Trowa - what did he have to lose?
"I like my lovers tall, dark and silent, Mr Barton. Preferably laid on
a bed - preferably without overnight bag; without any baggage,
to be honest. I apologise deeply - I'm not qualified to comment on anyone's
relationship when I've had so little experience of my own."
Trowa raised an eyebrow - it was a sincere apology, and he was impressed
despite himself. He'd noticed that while they talked, Quatre had dropped
many of his mannerisms, and his lazy affectations of speech. "So there
is genuine breeding under that flippant charm, Mr Winner! I appreciate
you showing me that - I suspect that you enjoy your act just that little
bit too much to let your guard down very often."
Quatre didn't answer - there was a slight flush on his cheeks. He turned
towards the bar and raised a hand for his turn at the beers; when he turned
back, Trowa was still gazing at him.
"Do you always get your own way, Quatre?"
Quatre's eyes were level with his, and steady. "No. But I'll always try."
He thought that his name sounded different on Trowa's tongue - like a
fine wine; like a delicacy to be savoured. He wanted to hear it again.
Trowa's eyes flashed. "Hasn't anyone ever challenged you? Ever tried to
tame that wild arrogance you trade on so confidently?"
Quatre blanched at Trowa's blunt, personal criticism. Guess it was payback
time! "I don't do 'tamed', Trowa."
Trowa laughed - and then Quatre realised that he hadn't intended any real
hostility towards him at all - it was just Trowa's way to be so direct.
"So I imagine! And if you did, I can't think you'd be as much fun, would
you?"
"So -?" asked Quatre, his mouth a little dry.
"So another drink will be fine, another day. Some time after the show
- I think that we still have to get through that day, for the sake of
both Heero and Duo. Then we'll see. But just that - a drink." He could
feel the smile lingering on his face as he met Quatre's pleased expression.
He felt he was smiling a lot, tonight. This man was most amusing - an
unusual challenge. It had been a while since he'd been interested in anyone
else at all - for whatever reason.
"I'm not looking for anything else, you see, Quatre."
Quatre looked at the handsome, confident face and his heartbeat quickened.
"But neither am I, Trowa." His voice dipped lower.
"Neither am I!"
+
It was the night before the show. Heero stood alone in the darkened gallery,
and wondered why he felt that things were going wrong.
One of the issues was, admittedly, that the gallery was still shrouded
as before. None of the exhibits could be seen - all of the displays were
hidden. He'd argued fitfully with Duo over the last couple of weeks, demanding
he show him what was planned - Heero wanted to know what to expect; what
to be prepared for. He wanted to know whether 4:DRMS had been finally
included or not. But Duo hadn't relented - the final preparations were
his alone. Of course, thought Heero, I could just pull off the
dustsheets and see for myself!
But he didn't.
Was that the problem? That he was worried about what Duo may do with his
gallery? That he'd argued with him? Surely not! They argued all the time,
didn't they - they were in agreement only when they let the passion take
over.
Was that all there was to it - to their affair? The physical passion?
He hadn't seen Duo for the last forty-eight hours; not even spoken to
him. He'd been called away to an acquisition meeting up north - even so,
there were always 'phones; Duo had replaced his cell phone some time ago,
and he could have contacted him at any time. Instead, knowing that Duo
would be busy on the show, Heero had convinced himself that the artist
wouldn't want to be disturbed. Maybe he'd never wanted to be disturbed
in the first place; had never really wanted any connection with the Yuy
Corporation, let alone Heero Yuy himself. Their last meeting had opened
up all sorts of confusion and contradiction; passion and pain. There'd
been such physical ecstasy - matched with emotional discord.
But then he'd already been warned how Duo felt about it all, hadn't he?
Duo had told him once, had confessed to the way he fucked -'plenty enthusiasm,
but fuck all commitment!' he'd said. Heero couldn't deny he knew how things
stood.
He wasn't used to this sort of thing - this personal conflict. His only
strategy had been to take himself away, and try to regain some perspective.
For the first time ever, he hesitated at going up to see Duo. There was
a sliver of pale light under the closed door up to the apartment that
suggested that Duo was at home - just feet away. Quite deliberately, Heero
turned back to stare around the gallery instead. They always met here,
didn't they? The gallery felt like neutral territory in the middle of
a war zone. They planned here; they argued here; they discussed here.
Duo drew here; Heero watched. They fucked here. He wanted Duo to come
to his apartment sometimes; he wanted him at his house. There'd
never even been the suggestion of it.
There was a rustle of noise behind him then, and a slice of the low light
spread out across his feet. The door up to the apartment had opened. He
didn't turn back to face it. When Duo spoke behind him, it wasn't a surprise,
though the tone of his voice was. He sounded a little drunk.
"Heero Yuy - now there's a surprise! You've been Mr Busy for the last
coupla days, I think. It's a little late now for checking the hold, isn't
it? The pirates have been and gone - we sail tomorrow, with or without
your blessing!"
"Is that how you see me?" asked Heero. "Checking up on you?"
"I'm an employee," mumbled Duo's voice. "I do what I'm told -"
"You've never fucking done that in your life!" snapped Heero, suddenly
furious, and he whirled round to face Duo.
Duo stood, framed in the doorway, backlit by the gentle upstairs light.
Heero saw the tall frame, the casual way he leant against the door; the
grimace on his face. He saw the lean, tight body, barely dressed as Duo
so often was; the naked chest and legs; the soft jersey shorts.
He realised suddenly that in his brief time away he'd gained no perspective
at all where Duo Maxwell was concerned. He realised for the first time
in his life what it felt like to want to jump someone's bones. He realised
how damned miserable he was going to be if all they ever did was argue;
he realised how it didn't matter a flying fuck to him where they
met, so long as he got to touch him, and be with him, and listen to that
sharp, bright, vivid voice...
He was lost to it all!
+
"Whoa, Heero - we don't often hear you swear, do we?" Duo's eyebrows were
raised, as he stepped out into the gallery. His footing was sure, even
in the semi-darkness; he wondered if Heero had smelt the drink on his
breath, and assumed he was drunk. Heero should know better, of course
- he should know that Duo wouldn't have risked that, the night before
the show. Heero's show.
But he'd had a couple of disturbed nights, and he'd needed a quick pick-me-up
tonight - his regular sleep had been broken by the return of nightmares.
They'd been very frequent just after Solo died, but the therapists had
all said they'd pass. He hadn't had them for a while now, and not since
he'd been working at the gallery. They just came back occasionally - when
he was at his most tired. At his most stressed.
That's all it was - stress about the show.
"Guess that's true, about me not doing what I'm told," he said, more coolly.
"Is that why you've been avoiding me, then? Scared of what I'll be unveiling
tomorrow?"
"Of course not!" snapped Heero. He looked around the gallery, seeing dark
shadows and unidentified stacks of equipment. The whole room looked cluttered,
full of display materials and discarded packaging. Pictures were already
hung on the walls, but covered in sheets that shone dull and grey in the
night time. Some lay stacked against the walls for the time being - there
were careless piles of paper and tissue on the floor. The perspex wall
was completely shrouded - there were only a couple of mysterious little
bumps under the fabric. The ceiling wires hung down, glinting emptily
above their heads like thin, metallic snakes.
Duo noticed how Heero held his hands tightly at his side - as if he had
to stop himself reaching out. He was a little shocked to feel how strongly
he felt the same - the sight of Heero had been a shock that rippled through
him, speeding up his heartbeat and shortening his breath. Looked like
he'd come straight from work - smart suit, a little creased from travel;
hair a little less than perfect; that habitual cologne, a light, musky
smell that was all Heero. Duo felt as if Heero were all around him; the
warmth of his presence suffused the cold night air of the gallery, its
teasing tendrils creeping out towards Duo's body. His skin shivered in
response.
"Looks to me like you're worried about it..." he said, a little sulkily.
"I want the show to do well, Duo!" Heero protested. "I want my gallery
to do well -"
"Your gallery?"
It sounded like Heero cursed under his breath. "I didn't mean -"
"But that's what it is, isn't it?" Duo heard his voice rising in both
volume and pitch. "Your gallery."
"It's part of your life, too!" Heero's expression was startled - he was
rushing out his words. "Your life will have a share of that success too
-!"
"You took my life away with your damned Corporation and your bills
of sale and your heads of leases -!" spat Duo. He wondered where the hell
that had come from, but he couldn't bite the words back now. He
glared at Heero, instead - the dark indigo eyes met his in return, darkening
in anger.
"Damn you!" growled Heero.
"And what am I now?" Duo continued on, relentlessly. "On a salary - on
a leash to the great God of Commerce!" He felt like he'd opened his mouth,
and words were falling over themselves to escape. "I'm nothing but an
employee - nothing but a surplus-to-requirements Mr Ordinary. Everything
else has gone. Everything I cared about - everything that was mine! My
dreams, my plans, my talent, my independence -"
His eyes were blurred with dampness and anger, and for a brief moment
he felt as distraught as he had when Solo died. But this was nothing like
it, of course it wasn't!
What the hell's going on, kid? he asked himself, in the one small
corner of his mind that was still sane. Why are you giving the guy
such a hard time?
He didn't have an answer.
"Why are you like this, Duo?" came Heero's cold voice, echoing once again
his own thoughts. It was uncanny, that... "Full of self- pity... picking
a fight with me. What's happened? Have I upset you somehow?"
"Christ, Heero - you are so -!"
"So -?" Heero scowled.
"So - " Duo floundered - his throat was too tight to speak properly. Look
at the guy there! Even when he was angry, he looked so cool - so in control.
So self-confident, so together. So gorgeous - so right!
Heero stared at Duo's furious face for a second or two more, and then
his body seemed to tense up. He buttoned up his suit jacket - tugged absentmindedly
at a wrinkled cuff. "I don't have to stay and put up with this, Duo, and
you know it. If you think I've got something to answer, OK, we can talk
about it. But you don't appear to be in that kind of mood, so I'll go."
He turned on his heel to stride back to the door. "You appear to hate
me too much to listen -"
"I don't hate you," said Duo, loudly; abruptly. Heero paused, his back
still to Duo.
"I missed you like shit," said Duo. He didn't know what else to say, and
his words sounded bleak and pathetic in the deserted room.
"I was only away for a couple of days," said Heero, quietly.
"I can fucking count!" said Duo, sharply.
And then Heero started laughing.
+
Duo broke his mouth away from Heero's, gulping a deep and desperate breath.
They'd fallen against each other just after Heero started to leave - they'd
grabbed, and grasped, and reached for each other like parched men would
snatch water from its source. Now they leant against the wall nearest
to the apartment door, still standing, still wrapped around each other
as if they were one person. The only light was from upstairs, and from
the greedy shine in their eyes. Their hearts hammered fiercely - their
hands gripped tightly to each other's clothing. They'd been crushed against
each other for what felt like hours, but what was probably actually only
minutes. Heero's jacket was now on the floor, his shoes kicked off and
rolled to the side of the room, and his tie was loosened. Duo's shorts
were still on, but they hung dangerously loosely at his hips, as if there'd
been some abortive tussling by a couple of pairs of eager hands.
"I'm not going anywhere now -" Heero laughed and moaned at the same time.
"Let me breathe -!"
"Maybe," gasped Duo. "Maybe not!" There was more laughing - more hunger
- more mouths reaching, and sucking, and licking -
"Did I scare you, Duo?" Heero sighed and smiled, and relaxed into the
soft taste that he'd never forgotten, not even in his sleeping hours;
the taste that he couldn't imagine surviving without. "Thought I was running
out on you?"
"Like you'd dare..." Duo hissed. "But then you ain't scared of
anything, are you, Heero Yuy?"
I never used to be, thought Heero, to himself. I think I am
now. His hand gripped Duo's waist as if to reassure himself of his
reality.
"Of course, you might be scared of somethin'," murmured Duo playfully,
running his teeth along the lobe of Heero's ear. "Scared that in a coupla
days I've forgotten all about ya - that you won't get another taste of
my sweet ass this side o' Christmas..."
"Like you've kept me at arms length tonight!" Heero scowled, only half
joining in the teasing.
Love that scowl, thought Duo. Love the way his mouth purses
like that! Love the way he tries so hard to make sense of the total crap
that I fling at him -
He felt the shame wash over him like a sudden, ice-cold wave.
"Is this arms length, then?" He tightened his arms around Heero
almost aggressively. He saw a slight bubble of salty saliva at the edge
of Heero's mouth, and he quickly licked it away.
Heero grinned - and growled. He wanted him - badly. Duo felt the increased
heat between his legs - the pressure of Heero's swelling erection against
the front of his shorts.
They held each other tightly for another few seconds. Duo thought that
it felt like a damned good fit. He reached to kiss Heero again - and again!
He could feel the coil of mischief and lust stirring deep inside his groin.
He slipped a hand down and gripped the straining arousal in Heero's pants.
He snickered softly, and felt Heero's breath hitch.
"Duo -"
"Want you, too, Heero. Let's do it here!"
"Here? - what do you mean? Don't you want to go upstairs -?"
"What I want, Heero Yuy, is to strip that tired old business suit
off your luscious limbs, suck the outline of my name all over your belly,
and then spread myself for you to fuck. Right here!"
"Here?" re-echoed Heero. His voice sounded weak with lust at the mere
thought.
"Uh-huh!" grinned Duo. "Right at the scene of the crime, eh? Where tomorrow
we'll either see my victory or my commercial crucifixion!" He started
to peel away at the buttons of Heero's shirt; he tugged mischievously
at the tie, until it slid out from under Heero's collar.
Heero felt the shudder of desire launch itself through his body. "I don't
-"
"You do!" muttered Duo. "Whatever excuse you have - whatever inhibition
you've re-learned up north - it ain't gonna resist me!"
Duo's mouth slid hungrily along Heero's chin, licking at the slight evening
stubble he found there. He started to lap at his neck, sorely tempted
to suck a mark there, but just restraining himself at the last minute.
He had a terrible longing to devour Heero - to possess him - to absorb
him into his very being! Heero's skin was hot and wet under him; the dark-haired
man arched himself back, gasping - his neck was bared to Duo, as if he
begged for more attention.
"You're mad, Duo -"
"Uh-huh," Duo agreed, but he couldn't have told Heero exactly what he
was admitting to. It was just so perfect to have Heero back under him,
squirming and gasping and willing! He had, indeed, missed him -
he'd fought the alien feeling, and he'd despised himself for the strange
weakness, and he'd tried to immerse himself in the preparations for the
show... but he'd still missed Heero like shit.
Damned man was addictive!
He didn't allow into his memory the thread of fear - the night time horror
of waking, and imagining that Heero wasn't coming back at all; at the
very least, not to him.
The nightmares had been nothing to do with that, had they?
+
Heero stumbled in the semi-darkness over a pile of stacked palettes, and
two packing cases. He swore at the sudden pain in his shin. "Christ, this
is awkward, Duo -"
"Plenty of space!" grinned Duo. He could hear his breath panting now -
his cock was aching inside his shorts. With one hand he grasped at Heero's
neck, drawing him back in for another bruising kiss. He slid the other
hand down the front of his own shorts, rubbing some relief to his arousal.
"I want to do that," came Heero's growl. Duo smirked - it worked every
time!
"Be my guest," he murmured, and sucked in his breath as he felt the long,
slender fingers sliding in under the thin fabric, and wriggling around
his damp pubic curls. Heero took a steady, yet reverent hold of his cock,
and Duo groaned.
He leant back against the wall, and now it was his turn to arch his neck
and rub up against the firm caress. He kicked away a roll of wiring at
his feet - he saw Heero's hand push out at a trolley that had somehow
come rolling up to greet them. Heero's body came tight up against him,
the two of them pressing close to the wall.
"We can be seen from the street -" gasped Heero.
"Like - if they get down on their knees and peer under the blinds and
have a relative with bat-sight -" moaned Duo. "I got no problem with that
-"
Heero started to pump him - lazily; carefully; deliciously. "Fantastic..."
he sighed. "Never got this up north..."
"Should fuckin' well hope not!" whimpered Duo. He'd peeled Heero's shirt
open - now he pushed the cloth back off his shoulders, wanting to feel
the naked skin against his own. It fell to the floor with a crumpled whisper.
The door to the upstairs was ajar - it shifted gently from a distant breeze,
and the cooler air swept across their chests, nipples springing erect
in sudden response.
"Goddd...." groaned Duo. "I wanna be naked, Heero - I want you
to touch me, to hold me - to fuck me -!"
"No sucking?" murmured Heero, his arm around Duo's bare shoulders, and
his eyes fixed on the protesting tent in his lover's shorts. Duo grabbed
at his other hand, pulling it up to his face, and drawing the fingers
into his plump lips.
"Can't wait that long! Only these!" he growled. "I'll suck 'em - if you'll
put 'em where I most need 'em -!"
"Looks like you've been missing this down south, as well..." said
Heero, throatily. He swallowed heavily, just the once, then watched as
Duo sucked enthusiastically on his fingers, soaking them with his warm
saliva. Duo's voice moaned around the fingers and his own busy tongue
- his legs moved apart; his hips strained against Heero's groin, feeling
for the response he needed.
"You want me to get on the floor -?"
"No," hissed Heero. "You're the one who said we'd do it right here. So
turn around -"
Duo's eyes flickered in the dim light, full of excitement and surprise
alike. He let Heero's fingers slip noisily out of his mouth, and he slowly
turned on his bare feet, to face the wall. He put out tentative hands,
to brace himself. He was breathing heavily; he was unusually tense.
Heero's body was close up against him, the naked muscles of his chest
covering Duo's bare back. Duo felt his braid moved gently to one side,
and fingers running down the raised surface of his spine. He arched up
against them, wondering if he really was purring like a cat, or whether
it was just his desire calling. He felt the soft brush of Heero's hair
against his neck, and then there were teeth and soft lips against his
skin, making the shape of bites all across his shoulders and down to his
shoulder blades. He was a mess of sensation; his arms threatened to shake
and lose their hold; his skin leapt with goosebumps.
Heero's hands came to his waist, and tugged gently at the shorts. Not
gently! gasped Duo to himself. How the hell was he meant to cope with
this if Heero touched him gently? He felt the flimsy fabric start
to slip down his thighs - he felt the inexpressible joy of his cock springing
free, and the fresh air stroking against the weeping tip. The material
pooled around his ankles, and he stepped quickly out of it, kicking it
to the side. He was naked - he felt every breath of air in the room, every
whisper of movement from the soft, rustling tissue around the patiently
waiting pictures. Heero's fingers were tracing softly against his hip
- Duo knew he was following the pattern of his tattoo. Heero liked to
touch it; to kiss it; to stroke it, as his fingers meandered their way
down Duo's hips towards his groin.
Duo arched his spine again and stretched his head back towards Heero's
- his hands dropped a little way further down the wall, and his ass was
pushed out against Heero's hips. He could feel the rock hard shaft between
Heero's legs, forcing itself impatiently against the fabric of the smart
pants; rubbing against the cleft of Duo's buttocks, as if it were looking
for its home away from home.
Duo groaned aloud. "Now, Heero - God - get on with it -!"
Heero's hand pressed firmly on his back, making him lean further forward.
Both arms were braced against the wall now, his back straightening out
and his head dropping down between his shoulders. A hot, clothed thigh
thrust itself between his own, kicking his legs further apart. He was
panting even more heavily now. He felt the frisson of fingers at his entrance
- a palm gripping his buttocks, and prising them wider open. The fingers
were still damp with his saliva - with his sucking. He heard Heero catch
his breath, and then one of the fingers slid possessively into his ass.
Duo moaned - he wriggled up against it, trying to suck it into him even
more deeply. To seek its companions - to encourage its exploration. There
was a soft laugh of pleasure from Heero, and another finger joined it.
This time, it was hooked - this time it probed at him, looking for a place
to bring him even more delight; even more agony.
Duo yelped as Heero found the place - as he pressed against his prostate,
his body already sensitive with anticipation. His legs started to shake.
"Tell me, Duo..." whispered Heero's voice at his ear. He was panting,
too. "Tell me what you want -"
Duo didn't have the time or the energy to examine this reversal of roles
- the loss of his usual verbosity. He just ached for Heero - his mouth
felt full of unspoken pleas; his chest felt strangled by his neglected
needs. The sound of Heero's zip rasping open was music to his ears. The
muscles of his hole flexed; his ass throbbed with the anticipation. He
could feel the hot, damp flesh of Heero's groin at the back of his thighs.
"Lick me first, Heero..." he whispered hoarsely. "I - please -"
He felt Heero hesitate for a second behind him, and then kneel down on
the floor. The hands still played at his buttocks, but now the invasive
fingers slid out, and he felt his muscles tighten back up without them.
Heero's lips touched at his thighs - licked at the clenched muscle of
his buttocks. The fingers returned to his ass, pinching the flesh, opening
up the crevice between his cheeks. There was hot breath between them -
there was something hard, and slick, and demanding up against his entrance
again. Duo was almost speechless - his throat was gripped with excitement.
The tip of Heero's tongue pressed its way inside his ass.
+
Duo shuddered with something deeper and more shocking than he'd ever felt
before. His response was animalistic - his body surrendered every ounce
of sexual control it had ever had. He couldn't understand how he could
still be standing, when every nerve was reduced to liquid, leaking its
sensual way all through his body. When Heero started to withdraw, and
then plunge his tongue back into him, he began to wail.
"Hush," came the warning; he could feel the shape of Heero's smile against
his skin. "You want the traffic out there to hear you and call the police?"
Duo thought they could sell fucking tickets and he wouldn't care! Slowly,
tortuously, Heero fucked him with his tongue, gripping hard at his legs
to hold himself in place, and burying his face into the sweetness of Duo's
ass. Duo wailed some more - he cursed aloud at the need for more stimulation
for his agonised cock. He yelled when Heero slid a finger in beside his
tongue, and started to probe for his prostate again. Heero sucked, and
licked, and thrust, and Duo was a blubbering wreck.
"Didn't want to miss out on the sucking, Duo," came the muffled
words. "And now? What do you want now, Duo?" His lover's voice was a damp,
musky breath against his buttocks.
"I want you, Heero -" he gasped. Why did the words feel different in his
mouth tonight? Why did it seem more than just the usual banter - the usual
begging for physical satisfaction? He felt disorientated; it wasn't just
his physical nakedness making him feel exposed. "Heero... please...take
me now! Fuck me now -!"
When he heard the slight rustle of a plastic package being opened behind
him, he realised that he'd not yet asked Heero to use protection - it
hadn't even crossed his mind! Desperate times, he groaned to himself.
He was so impossibly fraught that he'd have taken Heero's cock as it was
- in all its uncovered glory. In fact, the vision of that sent shivers
down an already shivering body. He wondered when the hell Heero bought
condoms - when he'd started to carry one with him. 'Praps it was one of
the quaint customs he'd brought back from the alien north...
'Praps Heero was as much involved in this relationship as he was himself.
Duo wondered - yet again - why tonight felt so strange; so different.
Then the physical excitement swamped him; the crown of Heero's cock was
pressing insistently into him. It was damned hard - but the touch was
frighteningly soft. He bit his lip as he tried to stretch his legs further
apart - as he felt Heero's body bend slightly to get a better angle.
This is where we meet - he thought, wildly. Heero was forcing himself
in deeper - Duo could hear his gasps of concentrated breath. Looking down
under his braced arm, he could see the shapes of the gallery behind them;
the place that he knew so well; the preparation for the show that was
so much more his than Heero's. Where things were familiar - where
he could continue to hide for as long as he was allowed. This is where
we fit together! he thought. Heero's hands were tight on his hips
now, pulling him back and forth on to his shaft. This is how it's always
gonna be...
Isn't it?
Heero groaned above him - there was a sudden throb to his cock, a swelling
that heralded his imminent coming. He slid a hand under Duo's belly, where
the muscles were taut and stretched; he grasped at Duo's cock, and began
to pump him. Duo knew he wouldn't last long either - his climax already
threatened, his cock bobbing out thickly from his groin. His whole body
was as tight as a wire with the thrill and the need for Heero. He wanted
to call to his lover - he wanted to tell him how he felt. To ask him to
join in the amusement and the joy.
He said nothing - instead, he clenched his muscles around Heero's cock,
and allowed the waves of ecstasy to flood his nerves. The floor creaked
very slightly underneath them - there was the sound of sweaty, slapping
flesh as Heero thrust in and out; Duo felt the muscles in his calves straining
in protest as he held himself up for Heero's best comfort.
Duo gasped - "Shit, Heero -" and then his climax ripped through
him, bursting out of his cock and straining against the boundaries of
Heero's strong hand, the cum sending its steamy, thick trail over Heero's
fingers, and splattering down on to the bare boards of the floor. He shook
under Heero's body - his limbs jerked with the force of the reaction.
There was a sharp, sweet urgency to this coming - not that he hadn't been
desperate before, many other times. But there was an emotion much deeper
this time; much more than just the passion and lust. His chest was too
tight - his limbs too weak. There was a pain inside that felt like heartache;
the suspicion of tears springing to his eyes.
Heero shuddered above him, his hips slamming tightly up against his buttocks.
He gave a deep, guttural groan of satisfaction as he came, and Duo felt
him throbbing deeply up inside - felt the muscles of his torso tighten
fiercely against Duo's supporting back. His arm clutched tightly at Duo's
body, anchoring them both in the sensation.
Don't leave me, thought Duo, hearing the thread of a new desperation
in the words. He didn't want Heero to hear him - he seemed to have little
control over his voice tonight. But he couldn't stop the emotion itself.
The anguish came from nowhere - and consumed him.
Don't ever leave me, Heero!
+
Duo's legs buckled as Heero drew out of him, and he sank down to sit on
his ass on the cold boards. He felt exhausted - he felt exhilarated! He
felt as if he'd run a marathon and then jogged up and down a mountain
for additional entertainment. He felt like months of need and desire had
just been released.
Heero turned his back to the wall and slid down to the floor beside him.
For a while, they sat there, panting, trying to regain their normal breathing.
Duo was completely naked - Heero had his pants on, but they were open,
and snagging halfway down his hips. He dragged a handkerchief from his
pocket - he pulled off the condom with a satisfied sigh.
Duo sneaked a look out of the corner of his eye - Heero looked good! He
looked flushed, and his chest heaved a little after the exertions, but
he looked damned happy. Physically satisfied; content.
Heero looked back at him; caught his gaze. His tongue licked out at his
dry lips. "Water?" he murmured.
They both stared over at the corner of the gallery, where there was a
faint glint of reflection from a water cooler. Then they both looked back
at each other; propped against the wall, their breathing harsh in the
still air, their bodies shining with sweat. There were clothes in a heap
beside them and their critical muscles were still screaming complaint.
Neither looked as if they'd be moving any time soon.
"Not bothered," said Duo, lightly. They both laughed a little; a happy,
weary sound.
"Remember, Duo, you said you fucked with plenty enthusiasm -?"
Duo flinched a little beside him.
"Love the enthusiasm!" sighed Heero. His head went back against the wall
- his hands were limp at his sides.
A grin broke out over Duo's face; his eyes sparkled. "Welcome back, Heero,"
he teased, a little of his mischief returning with his wits.
Heero grinned back. It was a companionable feeling, sitting here with
Duo, in the afterglow of fantastic sex. Of course, the evening hadn't
exactly started out very promisingly...
He shifted, as if to get more comfortable. His foot knocked against the
trolley, causing one of its wheels to squeak. "Look - what you said earlier,
Duo -"
Duo's heart sank. "It was shit!" he said, sharply. "Forget it. I was outta
order, OK?"
Heero ignored him. "Everything has gone, you said. Everything that matters
to you. I want to know if you meant it. What you meant."
Duo rolled his eyes, and rested his own head back against the wall. "I
don't know what I meant, Heero. I don't know what to think, half the time.
It's all just words to me - matters; cares; wants. Just words!
I haven't got time to talk it all out."
Why did Heero's silence seem to drag the answering words out of him?
"I've had a coupla bad nights, y'know? Cut me some slack, I just - look,
I'm just nothing. While you were away I thought and thought around it
all - me; you; the gallery. Stuff. But I can't get away from the
crap. I'm nothing on my own. I've nothing to offer. Things just don't
work for me."
He sighed. "I wanted to be different from Solo, y'know? Loved him - but
didn't wanna make the same mistakes. Wanted to be different..."
"You are," whispered Heero. "You're so much more than nothing that
I can't find the words to describe it!" Duo was shaking his head, but
Heero continued. "You're bright and bold and you speak your mind, even
-"
"- if it's crap?" grimaced Duo.
Heero tsked. "You're honest and talented and you've worked damned hard
for something that you've committed to -"
Sounds like you, Heero, thought Duo. Sounds like you...
Are we that alike after all?
There was a short silence. Duo felt one of his calves cramping up - his
ass felt a bit numb.
Heero's voice had become soft, low, and very chill. "Do you want to leave,
then? Do you want to finish this? If that's part of the problem; if it's
causing you such grief; I - I can let you go from the job..."
Duo let his head hang down, staring at his own lap. He didn't want to
meet Heero's eyes for fear of - well, for fear of something. "You'd
do that? Let me give it up?"
What? thought Heero. Let you go from the job? From me? He felt nauseous.
His words felt like hot, dry sand in his mouth.
"If that's what you want. No point in having a hostile employee..."
"I'm an executive, I'll have you know -!"
"Yeah," smiled Heero, a little sadly. "So you are."
There was another silence.
"OK," said Heero. He slid his legs out in front of him; let loose a small
groan as a joint creaked. "I'm going to say this, whether you listen or
not. I didn't mean to take everything from you - it was never meant that
way. I just saw the gallery deal - saw what I wanted."
"I know that," grumbled Duo. "You didn't take it away from me, of course
you didn't! I acted earlier like a spoiled kid. You just bought it - it
was me who gave it away."
Heero was ignoring him again. Duo didn't know whether he liked that or
not. It confused him.
"So take it back!"
"Huh?"
"Take back the gallery!" said Heero, sharply. "It can be yours again -
all of it."
"Don't be fucking stupid!" protested Duo. "I can't ever afford that, even
at the stupid rates you pay. And there's no other way I could take anything
off you."
They glared at each other for a moment.
Then Duo made a grunting noise and reached out for his crumpled shorts.
+
Heero felt the warmth of Duo's body rolling away - he felt the withdrawal
even more deeply than that physical sign. Duo had wriggled his shorts
on to his ankles, and was now kneeling up, pulling them back up to cover
himself.
Heero sighed; he ran a hand through his hair. "I'm finding this difficult,
Duo - carrying on like this. I don't want to, but it's the way I am. It's
hard...never knowing how you'll be - never knowing how you feel
towards me."
"You're - we're great, of course..." Duo's voice sounded hollow. "Anythin'
else is just more words, ain't it?"
"No," said Heero, deliberately. "There should be more, I think. That's
the problem. More than just this overwhelming lust..."
"Nothin' wrong with lust," muttered Duo. "Damn sight more reliable than
all that love 'n devotion stuff..."
Heero smiled, a little sadly. "You may be right, of course. But I care
for you as well, Duo - I care a hell of a lot." Not just words,
he thought, but feelings. That's what overwhelms me.
He sighed, deeply. He ran a hand through his tousled hair again; didn't
seem to know what else to do. Duo's disapproving silence was like a fist
around his windpipe, throttling him. He was determined to speak, though
- even if it were the last time he had the chance.
"You've changed me, Duo - just meeting you; just being with you. I can't
describe it, because it's been a revelation to me, and I haven't really
got my head round it yet. Christ, that's half the problem, isn't it?"
He laughed, self-consciously. "My difficulties in handling this properly
- trying to offer you what you want. But it's been magnificent! I want
you to know that..."
Duo had turned back to stare at him. His hand paused at the waistband
of his shorts; he sat back on his heels. His eyes were wide, and fixed
on Heero's mouth, like he was trying to understand words in an alien language.
He looked almost stricken.
Heero struggled on. "You see, I don't want to be always hiding away in
the gallery, meeting only at night, fucking in the dark - you know, just
as we have been. It's exciting - God, it's exciting! - but I don't
want that to be all there is. Getting off on the conflict - ignoring everything
else for the sake of fabulous sex." Hadn't Duo said that to him once -
that he didn't want the intimacy to be good for the wrong reasons? Had
all that been forgotten?
"Duo, I want to spend the days with you, as well." He thought he'd forgotten
to breathe, because his chest was hurting so much. "I want to be with
you - openly."
He saw Duo shift again beside him, and he realised how hot he felt - how
his head was hammering. "I know you're not looking for that, Duo, but
it's something I have to say for my own peace of mind. I've never known
anyone like you - I've never had anything like this before. Hell - I don't
want anything like this again, at least, not with anyone else!
I want to spend months learning more about you - "
Years, sighed his inner voices. Years...
"I've never felt this passion before." His voice was wondering; it was
softening further and further. "The colour blindness extended to more
than my sight. I never saw such colours in life - never saw the things
you show me."
He couldn't find any more words. He thought he should probably get up
and make his way home now, before Duo had to ask him to. But it was Duo
who spoke next. His voice was suspiciously quiet.
"You're astonishing, Heero Yuy. You're - I never met anyone like you!
You say I've changed you - I doubt it, man. I'm just a bit of rough for
you - something a bit different..."
"No," replied Heero. The pain in his chest was very sharp now. "You misunderstand.
You have no idea of my experiences before you met me - and I'd thank you
not to assume you do. That's not what I meant at all. I know what I want;
but I understand that you don't necessarily feel the same -"
Duo flinched beside him. Heero's words had been harsh; but then, his had
been patronising. "Sure. You understand - yeah, of course you do. I can't
give you more than this, Heero. I guess that's what I've been trying to
say all this time."
Heero's pain was still acute, but he felt quite calm now - he felt a great
relief for having spoken his true feelings. He knew that he wouldn't get
the same from Duo - and he'd make sure he didn't ask again. He could live
with the misery, he thought - for a while, anyway. It was all about managing
his expectations, wasn't it?
He'd wanted to tell Duo that he'd take whatever was on offer, for as long
as it was on offer. His feelings didn't really matter - it'd be enough
for him. But he knew that was a lie - just as he'd known that his pride
wouldn't let him do that.
But he didn't know where to go from here.
+
Duo's words were almost a whisper now. "I wish I knew what I wanted...
I wish I were you, Heero."
"Stupid idea," Heero snapped. "Stupid ambition, too -"
Duo was still musing aloud. "Your confidence - your assurance. It's fucking
attractive. I wish other things, too - other stupid things! Like
I wish you had something else of mine other than those two old pictures.
Wish I could give you something else..."
"I don't want anything like that from you, Duo," Heero sighed. "Though
I'd like to share my collection with you some time - see your reactions
to it - see what tastes we may have in common."
"After the show, then," said Duo, so softly that Heero almost missed it.
"You want to see it?"
"Sure."
Heero wanted to shout, I want to show you! I want to show you how I
feel - how I really am! He didn't. He rather thought he'd spoken
more than his fair share already; if he said any more, he thought he'd
run the risk of breaking everything up completely. He'd not had a definite
response from Duo about whether he wanted to leave or not. Dammit, he
didn't want to hear!
Duo turned away from Heero again, groaning slightly as he struggled to
his feet, pulling up his shorts properly and wincing at the returning
circulation to his legs. "Gotta go now, anyway. Gotta get some last things
ready for tomorrow. You'd better go home tonight - I don't need any more
distraction!" He smiled gently as he spoke, trying to relieve the harshness
of the words.
"Leave me to finish up here, Heero."
He stared at Heero, as if he were disturbed to see the effect his words
were having on the other man. Wishing, perhaps, he'd chosen another phrase;
something less dismissive; less ambiguous.
"It's been a hell of a night, hasn't it?" he said - there was a plea in
his voice, barely hidden.
"You're damned right it has," replied Heero, softly. He got carefully
to his feet, trailing his creased shirt in his hand; zipping up his pants.
For a moment, Duo seemed at a loss for words.
"I - need to think things through, Heero. Y'know?"
"I know," said Heero. "So do I." He looked up at Duo whose hand was on
the apartment door, ready to open it wide and go through. He didn't say
anything to try to stop him.
Duo sighed. "I'll see you tomorrow then, OK?"
He closed the door very quietly behind him.
[part 8] [part 10] [back
to FancyFigures' fic]
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