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By: Lyssira
Disclaimer: Not songie. Not Bishie. Not mine. The song belongs to P.O.D.
Warning: Songfic. Romance. Angst. POV (Heero's) Shounen Ai.
Pairing: 1+2+1
Note: For Sana.
Alive
//Everyday is a new day
I''m thankful for every breath I take//
He's lying in my arms like some sort of dark angel, black clothing contrasting
starkly with pale skin. His eyes remained closed, hiding the brightness
behind the lids, the violet glow that can be sunshine or shadow depending
on his mood. I've seen both a lot in the time I've known him, in the worst
battles and in his finest hours.
//I won't take it for granted
So I learn from my mistakes//
Sometimes I was the cause of shadow, sometimes sunlight, sometimes neither.
Some days, he'll just stop and his eyes won't smile any more, remembering
a regret or a worry. Other days the exact opposite will happen and the
clouds will part for the smile that breaks through.
//It's beyond my control, sometimes it's best to let go
Whatever happens in this lifetime//
It's one of those days where he is brilliant in his happiness and his
contentment just spills into my dreary world. I can't help but enjoy the
sunshine today. It's raining down on us in gold streams as we relax in
the park. He's curled against my chest, arms wrapped around me like a
child with his favorite teddy bear. I've done the same to him before,
when the nightmares grew too much, when the guilt grew too much, when
just plain living grew too much for me to bear. You'd never picture the
great Heero Yuy huddled against his lovers chest, sobbing. But it's happened.
//So I trust in love
You have given me peace of mind//
I don't notice for a while that I'm absently stroking his hair, or the
expanse of one smooth cheek. That bruise faded a while ago, I think, but
there have been others to take its place. You'd never know he punched
me in the mouth unless I told you, though that wasn't the last time he
hit me.
//I feel so alive for the very first time
I can't deny you//
The violence between us seemed to died after a while though, for a reason
neither of us know. Today has been quiet and should remain so. There is
peace on the horizon. If the world can enjoy it, why can't we?
//I feel so alive for the very first time
And I think I can fly//
I feel him stir against me and there's a crack of violet glancing my way.
I'm guessing he was awake all along because there is a glint of mischief
in that crack, no haze or confusion from sleep. A smile is playing on
the edges of his mouth, like it does when he knows something I do not.
Pale hands reach up to play with my hair, twisting it around lithe fingers,
ruffling it gently. As if it weren't already messy enough.
//Sunshine upon my face
A new song for me to sing//
He squirmed from his proffered resting place soon enough, reaching up
to plant a kiss on my mouth. Our first kiss is something I won't forget,
however unpleasant that day was for us both. I can still hear the rain
pouring down, see the lightning flash and reveal the hurt in those eyes.
I'm a complete idiot sometimes, though he'll never hear me say
it. If I'd left, where would I be now? Where would he be?
//Tell the world how I feel inside
Even though it might cost me everything//
"Thinking again?" he asks me, nuzzling my collarbone affectionately.
"Uh-huh," My lips touch his again, gently, more gently than
I've ever touched anyone.
//Now that I know this, so beyond, I can't hold this
I can never turn my back away//
"Bout what?" He's got that happy, intoxicated look, like
a man high on life and loving it. That's my second favorite expression
he has (like I'm gonna tell you my most favorite). If I were a poet, I'd
say that's what happiness should look like. Since I'm not, I will say
that there's something infinitely rewarding about making someone look
that happy. It's a kind of peace Relena can't write about on paper.
"Nothing much," I say.
//Now that I've seen you
I can never look away//
He rolls off me, gracefully landing on his own two feet. His eyes smile
and reaches his hand out, pulling me to my feet and towards our apartment.
I pull him close to me for a third kiss, ignoring a few stares cast our
way in favor of the way the sun seems to flicker around him, as if even
light seems to enjoy his presence. We head back to the apartment, a new
one with an actual bedroom. I can still hear all the arguments we had
in the old one echoing around me. I can almost see the betrayed expression
on his face, almost feel the brutal punches.
//I feel so alive for the very first time
I can't deny you//
Then, I think about peace, because we deserve it too.
//I feel so alive for the very first time
And I think I can fly//
~Owari~
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