it Down to Learning + Chapter 12 (cont)
"I still miss him,"
Zechs said flatly. He wasn't looking at Wufei, he was staring at the damned
table again, but Wufei could still see the misery on his face. "I
miss him every day. I think about him all the time. How could I ever want
anyone else, when I still want... "
He trailed off again, but his meaning was clear.
He wanted Treize, and noone else.
But Treize was dead.
Wufei bowed his head, acknowledging the other man's pain.
"The whole war... I went through all of that so that it would end,
and we would be together," Zechs continued. "But then... he
died." The blond stopped his face tensing, and when he spoke, it
was in a harsh whisper. "He died."
Wufei winced. Treize had died by his hand. He was the one who'd caused
Zechs this pain.
"He knew he would die," Zechs revealed unexpectedly. His lip
curled slightly. "He left me a letter. Une gave it to me, after the
Eve Wars. He... knew he wouldn't survive the war." Zechs' fist clenched.
"Damn him. He knew, and he let me do all that... he let me
waste the little time we had, and... "
"Zechs." Wufei reached out and touched the other man's arm,
not moving back even when Zechs flinched away from the contact. "Zechs...
you need to let him go."
Zechs stared at him through haunted blue eyes. "I can't," he
whispered. "I... don't want anyone else. I can't even think
of anyone as a... " He shrugged, frustrated. "As a replacement."
"You can't replace him," Wufei acknowledged softly. "But...
he's gone, Zechs. You can't bring him back."
Zechs looked away. "I won't go searching for someone to take his
place," he maintained stubbornly.
Wufei sighed. He stared pensively at the other man for a moment. Zechs
was one of the most obstinate people he'd ever known, and considering
the company that he kept, that was saying a lot. Once he had an idea in
that shining platinum head, it would never vacate.
He never would go searching for another lover, an act that he would see
as a betrayal of Treize's memory.
How this melodrama would have irritated the other man. Wufei could see
the scornful expression in Treize's cornflower blue eyes as clearly as
if the other man was standing beside him.
He'd have liked it. But it would still have irritated him.
However, the problem remained. Zechs would not look for companionship.
"Well... " he said aloud. "What if someone else comes to
you?" he mused softly.
Zechs stared suspiciously at him. Resolutely, Wufei pushed himself out
of the booth and looked expectantly at the other man. Zechs frowned at
the abruptness of the seeming dismissal, but he threw a few bills on the
table and rose as well.
Wufei turned his back, and left the bar, exiting into the sumptuous lobby
of the apartment building. There, he startled Zechs by turning left toward
the elevators, instead of right to exit to the street.
"Where are you going?" Zechs demanded as he caught up to the
slighter Chinese man by the elevators.
"To your apartment," Wufei replied calmly, watching the lights
above the elevator change as the machine moved down toward their floor.
Wufei could feel Zechs' suspicious glare on him as he watched for the
"Why?" the older man finally demanded.
Wufei looked at him calmly, and smiled. "I'm seducing you,"
he replied simply.
Zechs stared at him, his mouth open, a rather idiotic expression on his
handsome face. "What the hell do you mean, you're... "
Wufei raised a hand, silencing him as the elevator doors opened. He stepped
through the doors, and Zechs reluctantly followed him. The blond nodded
curtly at the elevator man, who greeted him enthusiastically as he punched
in the security code for the blond man's floor.
The attendant continued to chat amicably, and Wufei felt Zechs' irritation
rise as he was forced to make polite small-talk with the man. Shortly,
they reached Zechs' floor, and Wufei nodded politely at the man as they
He inclined his head in one direction, silently asking Zechs if his apartment
lay that way. Zechs nodded, then scowled in irritation. "No,"
he said aloud. "We're not going to my apartment."
"Well, there only seem to be two in that direction," Wufei noted
mildly. "I'll figure out which is yours. Process of elimination."
"You need to leave," Zechs announced, his tones clipped.
Wufei shook his head. "You're not being very flattering," he
told the other man.
"You're not... " Zechs pinkened. "You're not seducing me,"
he blurted out.
"Not yet," Wufei agreed. "I didn't think you'd like me
to in front of the elevator man. He'd probably notify the Scoop.
But if you want me to start here... "
Zechs made a noise of frustration, and stamped over to one of the heavy
white doors down the short corridor he'd indicated to Wufei.
The Chinese man followed him, looking around appreciatively as he entered
the apartment after Zechs. It didn't appear to be as big as the rooms
he shared with the others, but it was certainly a good deal of space for
"Now," Zechs said shortly. "I appreciate the offer, Wufei,
but I don't want... "
"You don't want me?" Wufei interrupted, raising a brow in surprise.
"That's certainly a change."
Zechs flushed again. "I did once," he admitted, "but...
"But you're determined to sacrifice all your own desires and your
own happiness on the altar of Treize?" Wufei speculated, a bit cruelly.
The flush disappeared from Zechs' cheeks, and he reeled back slightly.
Wufei moved to him, following the blond as he retreated across the room.
"I'm sorry, Zechs," he apologized. "I don't mean to hurt
you. But you can't continue like this. You have to let some people near
you, or you'll never have any peace."
"I don't need anything," Zechs insisted, his voice sounding
slightly strained. "I just want to be left alone, and... "
"You've been alone too much," Wufei corrected. "You need
people. You need to be touched," he continued softly, reaching out
to run his hand over the blond's cheek.
Zechs started, pulling away, but Wufei continued to move after him. "I
knew Treize too," he reminded the other man. "He loved being
worshipped, but I doubt that this is what he wanted for you."
"Wufei... Please. Just... leave. I don't want... "
"Yes, you do," Wufei corrected firmly.
"This isn't right," Zechs insisted. "You're... with others
now, and... "
Wufei hesitated briefly. "That's all right," he told the other
"I won't allow you to be unfaithful... "
Wufei laughed. "Zechs, there are five of us," he said mildly.
"We're hardly monogamous."
"This is different," the blond insisted stubbornly.
"You're right," Wufei conceded, nodding. "But it is not
The older man jumped, startled, as his back connected with the wall. Wufei
took advantage of his momentary lack of attentiveness, and pressed up
close to him, placing his hands on the wall beside Zechs' head, imprisoning
him in place as he rubbed his lower body deliberately against the blond's.
He couldn't help from smirking when he felt Zechs' hardness through his
pants. Deny it as he may, the other man wanted him.
"Wufei... please," Zechs whispered, staring at him. Their faces
were bare inches away, and Wufei could see the ring of darker blue that
surrounded the sea of icy blue, as well as he could see the confused anguish
emanating from the other man. "I haven't touched anyone since Treize
"Since... that's eight years, Zechs," Wufei managed,
stunned by this admission. "He's been gone for eight years... "
"Please," Zechs whispered. "I don't want... but I can't
Wufei sighed. He'd hoped that the other man would give in before it came
"I want you, Zechs," he said directly. "We have... unfinished
business between us. You need to resolve that, and you need to resolve
your memories of Treize, before you can go on."
"I don't want to go on," Zechs whispered. He closed his eyes,
and Wufei saw his face contract as though in pain. "There's nothing
to go on to, Wufei. I don't want to lose you, and him... "
"Zechs... you haven't had either of us in eight years," Wufei
reminded him as gently as he could.
The pale blue eyes opened, and Wufei stared into them, amazed by the naked
turmoil they revealed. He had never seen Zechs this unguarded. Never.
"But... I haven't fully lost you either. And that's all I have, Wufei.
Please... " the other man pleaded.
Wufei shook his head slowly. "I'm not letting you be alone with the
past anymore, Zechs," he said firmly. "That would be a poor
repayment for what you've done for me."
Wufei moved forward, and cut the other man's protests off with his lips.
Zechs tried to pull away, then suddenly gave up the fight. His body went
slack, and Wufei took advantage of the moment to deepen the kiss, sliding
his tongue between Zechs' lips, shivering at the remembered taste of the
older man's mouth.
Slowly, Zechs returned the caress, his hands moving up Wufei's arms to
tightly clench his shoulders. His response became more and more intense,
until they were battling for control of the kiss.
Wufei felt light-headed as he enthusiastically participated in this well-remembered,
passionate battle. It had never been easy with Zechs. It had always been
a fight, a duel, a war... but it had been one that was impossible to lose.
A growl rose slowly from Zechs' throat, and he began to push Wufei back
slowly, his lips never leaving the shorter man's. Wufei resisted the movement,
but allowed himself to be slowly pushed backward until he fell onto the
Zechs was on him a moment later, and Wufei groaned at the feeling of the
other man's body on top of his. Zechs was trembling with need, and Wufei
took pity on him, tugging his shirt open and running his hands over the
hard, bare skin beneath it.
The blond cried out softly, pulling his mouth away from Wufei's. The Chinese
man pushed him up, and rose with him, and they kissed again as they tore
each other's clothes from their bodies. They tumbled to the floor, missing
the couch entirely in their haste, and Wufei cried out as Zechs closed
trembling fingers around his erection.
"God! Zechs!" he cried, arching his hips toward the other man's
Zechs didn't reply, but his heavy breathing betrayed his own excitement.
Wufei opened his eyes as the other man pulled his legs apart, and he felt
Zechs kneel between his parted thighs.
He caught his breath at the sight of Zechs. Long blond hair rippled down
behind him, as the blond stared down at him through blue eyes fogged with
passion. His finely shaped lips were parted, and he was breathing deeply.
His broad shoulders, muscled chest and arms bragged of power, even as
they trembled with the effort it was costing him to maintain control.
He couldn't make him wait any longer.
"Please, Zechs," he moaned. "Take me. I want you. I need
The blond moaned softly at the words. "Wufei... " he managed
thickly. "I don't have... "
The Chinese man groaned softly. He sat up, not bringing his legs together,
and bent down, smoothly taking the blond's erection in his mouth.
He grinned as Zechs' startled, aroused cry rent the air.
Flexibility was a great thing. Martial arts training came in so handy.
He ran his mouth over the trembling organ, tasting and teasing it even
as he wet it, helping to lubricate it for smoother entry into his own
When he was satisfied, he lay back, spreading his legs even wider.
"Now, Zechs," he demanded. "Take me now!"
With a low cry of surrender, the blond complied, grasping his hips and
entering him in one swift thrust. Wufei cried out, slight pain spearing
Zechs stopped, gasping, allowing the smaller man to adjust around his
Wufei rocked back and forth, slowly, and the pain diminished, leaving
only hot, burning pleasure in its wake.
"More, Zechs," he pleaded. "Please... give me more."
"Wufei... I can't... I won't be able to stop... "
"Don't," the Chinese man ordered huskily. "I want it, Zechs.
I want you... hard and hot and fast and... "
The rest of his words were lost in a grunt as Zechs slammed into him again.
The blond cried out, and Wufei heard in the sound the last of Zechs' iron
control disappearing. Then, he couldn't think, couldn't do anything but
feel as the blond thrust in and out of him, pounding into him almost fiercely,
pushing again and again against the spot inside him that brought him the
Wufei lifted his legs and wrapped them tightly around the other man's
waist, his fingers digging into the blond's muscled back as his mouth
moved to blindly capture the blond's.
Zechs kissed him back almost painfully, his tongue thrusting masterfully
into his mouth in time with his lower body's thrusts into Wufei's passage.
Wufei felt that he was being pushed along the path of pleasure, ridden
harder and harder toward the ultimate end... he couldn't control the movement,
couldn't do anything except fall, and allow Zechs to carry him... as he
finally accepted that, finally surrendered, white hot pleasure overtook
him. He rode the wave higher and higher until he finally reached the top.
He tore his mouth away from the blond's and screamed Zechs' name as he
felt himself climax fiercely, and at almost the same moment, he felt Zechs'
passion explode inside of him.
The blond collapsed heavily on top of him, pressing deep and hard inside
him one more time as he emptied himself inside of Wufei. The Chinese man
wrapped his arms securely around the bigger blond, holding him tightly
as they panted together, slowly descending from the height they had helped
each other attain.
They lay there silently for a long time. Wufei raised his head, finally,
and looked down at Zechs. The blond's head rested against his shoulder,
and his eyes were closed peacefully, but his face wore an expression of
Wufei sighed softly, and leaned down to softly brush a kiss against the
other man's lips.
Zechs' eyes opened slowly, and Wufei winced at the loss and pain and guilt
he saw in them.
"Wufei... I'm sorry," he whispered. "I didn't mean to...
"Don't be sorry," Wufei whispered. "I'm not. At least,"
he amended, "I'm only sorry that you're hurt... "
Zechs pushed himself up. "Don't... worry about it," he said
austerely. "I'll be all right." There was an awkward silence,
then they both spoke at once.
"I understand that it's late, and you... "
"Where's your bedroom?"
Zechs stared at him in amazement. "My... what?" he asked slowly.
Wufei smiled gently at him. "Did you think I would go?" he asked.
He shook his head. "I'm not leaving you now, Zechs," he promised
He stared, amazed, as tears gathered in the other man's blue eyes.
"I'm not going," he promised again, leaning forward to wrap
the other man in a gentle hug.
"That's not what friends do," Wufei told him softly, leaning
back to stare at the blond. Zechs stared back at him, a wealth of desperate,
unspoken questions in his eyes.
"Besides," Wufei added, trying to add some lightness to the
situation, "it's not that late."
Zechs stared at him for a moment, then his gaze drifted down the Chinese
man's body. His eyes lingered on Wufei's groin, and Wufei felt a stirring
of interest between his legs as the blond continued to stare at him. The
blue eyes traveled slowly back up his body, and Wufei was amazed to see
that the blond was smiling faintly, though the shadows remained behind
"Not that late at all," Zechs agreed slowly, and the smile widened.
It was, Wufei decided as Zechs led him to his large bedroom and pressed
him down into the soft mattress, a very good start.
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