Pairings: 1+2+1, 3+4, 4+?
Category: Humour, possibly romance.
Disclaimer: Don't own/profit.
Attack + Part 3
Quatre was just on his way
to his office when a soft sound made him pause. It was very slight, the
sort of sound most people wouldn't even hear, or if they did, write off
as imagination. But Quatre wasn't a Gundam pilot for nothing.
He tipped the flowers out of a nearby pot and with this makeshift weapon
walked with the stealth of a cat in the direction of the sound.
The library door was just slightly ajar. Quatre took a deep breath and
flung it open. "Who's there?"
Quatre stared. "Wufei? Oh my -- are you under that bookcase?"
"Oh dear," Quatre put down the jug and knelt by the bookcase. "Is there
anything I can get you?"
"Try an ambulance, Winner."
"Oh, yes. Right away, Wufei!"
Quatre hurried down the corridor.
"You're in a hurry, Master Quatre," Auda noted as Quatre ran past. "Is
anything the matter?"
"A bookcase fell on Wufei," Quatre said. "I'm calling him an ambulance
-- Do you think you could get some of the others to help you lift
it off him?"
"Oops -- I mean, of course Master Quatre!"
"Loooooooooove me or leave me, make your choice but believe me --
I love you! I doooooooo-I do I do I do I -- huh?" Duo blinked as
Heero reached over him to push the volume up. He was immediately glomped
by an enthusiastic braided pilot. "Heero! You like my music!"
"Baka," the Japanese pilot chided. "I was trying to drown out your singing."
Duo pouted. "That's not a nice way to talk to your boyfriend."
Duo sighed. Heero didn't seem to get social interaction. He decided to
give him a hint. "Hey, Heero, I might go take a shower now."
"Hn." Heero continued to type at his laptop.
"You know, get all wet and naked -- shower?"
"Sounds like a good idea," Heero said.
"Ya think?" Duo purred, draping himself over Heero. "You wouldn't want
to join me?"
"Actually I was thinking I could get some work down with the quiet," Heero
Duo slammed the door so hard it disturbed Rashid's monitoring equipment.
"That is not a happy Gundam pilot," the unfortunate Manguanac operating
said equipment complained, wincing at the feedback. Rashid ignored him,
radioing ahead to Abdul down the hallway. "Heads up, Abdul! He's coming
your way. Initiate project plumbing!"
"Roger," Abdul said, quickly snapping the radio off.
Just in the nick of time. Duo came down the corridor, towel slung around
his neck, muttering something about all work and no play -- "Good
morning, Master Duo," Abdul said. "Where are you off to?"
"Actually I was hoping I could take a shower," Duo said.
"Unfortunately we seem to be having problems with our plumbing," Abdul
said putting a 'Not working' sign on the door.
"Great," Duo sighed. "And I really needed to wash my hair, too."
"The shower in Master Quatre's suite is still working," Abdul said. "I'm
sure he wouldn't mind if you used it."
"Really?" Duo brightened. "Hey, thanks Abdul." He headed down the corridor.
Abdul waited till he was out of sight then picked up the radio. "Operation
"Acknowledged." Rashid pressed a button. "Initiate phase two."
The Manguanacs in Quatre's office trembled. They'd spent the last twenty
minutes psyching themselves up for this -- yet still they were
not looking forward to this. It had helped that Rashid had agreed to their
request that the coffee not be too hot. After all, they could not risk
hurting their beloved Quatre.
"He's here!" the Manguanac in the corridor hissed. The Manguanacs took
their places. Quatre pushed the door to his office open and --
"Oops! Oh, Master Quatre, I am so sorry! A thousand apologies --
I have ruined your shirt!"
Quatre looked down at the coffee stain spreading across his shirt. "It's
okay," he said. "It was an accident."
"Let us fix that for you."
Before Quatre could say "I'm fine, really," he was picked up and hauled
bodily towards his suite.
"There you go!" The Manguanacs bundled him into the bathroom. "Give us
your shirt, we will get it cleaned immediately."
"That's really not necessary -- oh fine," Quatre surrendered his
shirt. "We will remove all stains Master Quatre! Now just get yourself
cleaned up!" The Manguanacs shut the bathroom door. Then quickly, before
they could lose their nerve, they locked the door and ran like hell.
Being Manguanacs they ran to the laundry to begin washing Master Quatre's
Abdul entered the room in which the Manguanacs were monitoring the progress
of project plumbing. "How is it going?"
"Very well," Rashid reported happily. "Phase two has been completely satisfactorily,
and phase three is about to begin."
There was a sudden screech from the radio equipment, as two startled yells
"And phase three is off to a good start," Rashid noted.
Duo, peered out from behind the shower curtain. "Sorry about that Quatre,"
he said. "I wasn't expecting anyone to be in here."
"Neither was I," Quatre said ruefully, picking himself off the floor.
"Anyone tell you that you have really good lungs, Duo?" he asked, wincing
at his ringing eardrums.
"Heero does, all the time. Except he doesn't put it like that," Duo replied.
"I'd offer to help you up but I'm wet -- "
Not to mention naked, Quatre thought trying not to blush. "I'm fine. Don't
worry about it. I'm sorry I disturbed you."
"Not a problem. I should have asked you before using your bathroom but
the others seem to be having problems so Abdul pointed me towards this
one." Duo stepped back under the spray. His voice when he spoke again
was muffled. "I didn't know you wanted to use it, but I'll hurry and let
you have it -- "
"Don't rush," Quatre said. "I don't mind waiting. I'll just be outside."
He walked over to the door. "What?"
"You should walk around topless more often, Q," Duo said.
Blushing, Quatre went to open the door. And frowned. And tried again.
"Something wrong?" Duo asked.
"I think the door's stuck," Quatre said.
"Oh," Duo said. "So we're trapped in here until someone lets us out?"
"That shouldn't take long," Quatre said. "The Manguanacs will notice we're
missing very quickly." He sat down with a sigh. "I guess we just have
"Hope you didn't have a busy day planned, Q," Duo said. "Hey, as long
as you're here, you couldn't help me with my hair, could you?"
"And phase three is going well," Rashid smirked as he listened to the
radio. "Nothing but splashing and giggling."
"Oh dear," Abdul said.
"Oh dear?" Rashid was affronted. "I thought that was a good sign."
"Not that," Abdul pointed to a screen. "We forgot about Heero."
Another bathroom with an out-of-order sign? Heero was growing impatient.
He'd finished his report earlier than expected, although it had to be
admitted that the thought of surprising Duo in his shower had led him
to rush the final paragraphs. So here he was, looking for the baka --
and where was he?
He couldn't imagine Duo being prevented from washing his hair and not
coming back to moan about it which meant he must have found a shower somewhere.
Heero passed the hall way that went to Quatre's suite and paused. The
almost uncanny senses that had sustained him through the war had caught
the sound of water.
Heero followed it. He didn't feel any compunction about entering Quatre's
bedroom, rapping sharply on the bathroom door. "Who is in there?"
"Heero? Is that you?" Duo replied, not waiting for a response. "Heero,
we're locked in, could you go and find someone to let us out?"
"Hn," Heero said. "Who is 'we'?"
"I'm not sure how it happened," Quatre said. "But the lock must have jammed
after I came in. Of course I didn't know Duo was in here when I came in
Heero didn't hear that last statement. His mind was running along the
combination of shower, naked Duo, locked door, Quatre + large amounts
of time --
"Hn," he said and put his fist through the door. The lock fell off and
the door swung open.
Duo and Quatre stared at the lock, and at the hole in the now open door.
"That's my Hee-chan!" Duo chirped happily.
Heero stared. "What exactly are you doing?"
"Like it?" Duo waved a hand. "It was supposed to be bunny ears but they
kept falling into each other so I decided to see how much bubbles I could
get to stay on Quatre's head at once. I call it 'Afro à la Quat'."
"Bubble bath," Quatre explained to the still unenlightened Heero. "Duo
found a bottle of it in the cabinet while looking for things to pick the
lock with. It reminded me of how my sisters used to play hairdressers
with it and Duo decided he wanted to try, and as I had yet to take my
shower -- "
"Hn," Heero grunted. He was glad to see that although Quatre was in the
bath Duo did have a towel wrapped around his waist.
"Stay still, Quatre -- I wanna see how you'd look with a beard,"
Duo said, gathering more bubbles from the bath.
Heero decided this had gone far enough.
Duo eeped as he was slung over one shoulder. "I guess I'll see you later
then, Quatre," he said as Heero carried him out.
Quatre waved and smiling at his friend's antics started washing his hair
Rashid watched grimly as Duo was carried down the corridor. How dare Heero
Yuy interfere with Master Quatre's happiness? "Abdul? We need some mobile
"Are you aware," his deputy answered slowly, "that this is the Heero Yuy
who has self-detonated on several occasions with few ill effects, and
who has saved the world numerous times?"
"Your point is what?"
"That we're going to need a lot of mobile suits."
Rashid smiled. "Someone organise a new door handle for Master Quatre's
bathroom. The rest of you accompany me to the hangar."
In the end they decided to go for a more subtle approach. Reasoning that
even perfect soldiers get hungry occasionally, they set the fridge to
fall over at the touch of a special remote. After nearly squashing Duo
on several occasions, this plan was abandoned.
Abdul snuck a secret cigarette outside in the stairwell as he ruminated
on the failure of their latest plan. Food poisoning had failed. Greasing
the corridor outside his room had failed, so had dropping a piano on him.
It had taken a lot of time to get the piano to the top of the stairway
too. It was beginning to look as though Heero was indestructible --
There was a click as a door shut further down the hallway. Abdul straightened
up as Heero came down the hallway, obviously deep in thought.
He greeted Abdul absently as he passed him.
This could be it -- "A moment, Master Yuy -- " Abdul started
after him, stepping forward too strongly, 'accidentally' bumping against
Heero -- who was jolted forward.
Foot met blank space, arm just missed banister -- then Heero righted
"Oh -- Sir -- I am so sorry!" Abdul said even as inside
he cursed. "Are you all right?"
"I'm fine," Heero said curtly. "Be more careful in future."
"I will," Abdul said.
Heero waited. "Well? What was it you wanted?"
Oh, heck. Abdul had not thought that far ahead. "Uh -- that is,
I -- uh -- "
Suddenly the door beside them swung open, thudding loudly as it connected
"Hey, Abdul," Duo said cheerfully. "You haven't seen Heero anywhere about,
Abdul stopped gaping. "As a matter of fact, I have," he said gravely.
"You just knocked him down the stairs."
[part 2] [part 4]
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