By TJ Dragonblade
DUO: She's posting?? (blinks incredulously) Damn! It's about bloody *time*!!
TROWA: Alright, everyone, this is a PWP. Pure, unadulterated, unabashed
DUO: Hell yeah! Down n' dirty smut at its finest!!
QUATRE: Um, Duo, that's not what we call it here...
DUO: Right. Sorry. So if you're not old enough to read this--
WUFEI: *Or* of a mind to appreciate it--
DUO: --right, that too--then don't read it!! And watch out for language
while you're at it. *And* since TJ's been scolded in the past for not
posting sufficient warning to her lemons *cough*Inyx*cough*cough*... (hands
Trowa a paper)
TROWA: (reading) "Warning: May cause internal meltdown and/or spontaneous
human combustion. May distract reader from more important concerns--do
not read fic while at work or in class. Do not drive or operate heavy
machinery while reading this fic. Use caution when mixing with other fics.
In case of accidental overdose, splash affected individual with ice-water
and seek immediate professional assistance--" TJ, what in *hell* is all
TJ: (blinks) Sufficient warning? (shrugs) I'm a firm believer in the theory
WUFEI: (shakes head)
QUATRE: So...what sort of professional would you call for assistance?
TJ: Mmm...sexy bishounen professionals, with palm fronds so they can fan
DUO: *Moving* right along... (bounces eagerly)
HEERO: (clears throat) Gundam Wing is created by Hajime Yatate and Yoshiyuki
Tomino, copyrighted by Sunrise/SOTSU Agency, and distributed by Bandai
WUFEI: We do not belong to TJ, despite occasional delusions to the contrary.
HEERO: This may be archived at wufeiduo.net and by anyone previously given
permission--now that it's been posted to the archive. She's tried to find
all the typos but fears she may still have missed some--
TJ: Damn you Ed! You're not s'posed to bother *me*!
HEERO: --and she's horribly anal-retentive about these things.
TJ: Oh, piss off.
HEERO: You *are*.
TJ: Look who's talkin', Yuy--
QUATRE: (cuts in to get back on track) And if anyone else wants to archive
it, please, just ask...
WUFEI: Also, please send feedback: email@example.com
DUO: Yeah--she's gotta maintain her over-inflated ego, after all... (mutters)
Now that she knows she has *fans* and all...
WUFEI: You know he speaks the truth. Continue.
TJ: (glares; then turns to audience and smiles) Thanks to everyone who
expressed interest when I mentioned this way back when--Sparky, Bronze,
San, and anyone else I may have inadvertently forgotten. Special thanks
and dedication to Hemlock Inyx, who has poked and prodded me about this
repeatedly and lent an oddly effective sort of motivation as well...(glances
nervously at Relena, sitting with crossed legs in the corner in her pink
PVC and tapping the handle of her coiled bullwhip against one palm while
smiling evilly) Um...yeah. Thanks!! Hope it's worth the wait...
QUATRE: Let's see...what else is there?
WUFEI: Set the stage.
QUATRE: Ah yes. It's AC200, which makes us all twenty or so; and most
of us are engaged in what we laughingly refer to as 'higher education'...
DUO: (rolls eyes) We're in college. On with the fic, hey?
"Yo! 'Fei! Wait up!"
Wufei paused in the hallway, half-turning against the tide of the student
body as he waited for his roommate to catch up to him. The slender figure
in black clothing knifed easily through the throng, braid swinging behind
him, books tucked under one arm, and came up with a grin in front of Wufei.
"Yes?" Wufei turned and resumed his journey down the hall; Duo fell into
step beside him.
"Nothin' much, really; I was just headin' for the cafeteria, y'know, grab
some lunch...you wanna join me? Then mebbe we could hang out or something;
I've got nothing to do for the rest of the day..." He trailed off hopefully.
Wufei ignored the way his heart-rate picked up ever-so-slightly at the
invitation and sighed. "Setting aside the fact that the fare you offer
is not something that could be termed 'appetizing' by any but the lowest
of standards, I would be delighted," he answered, smiling as Duo laughed
in agreement with his assessment of the University's cafeteria food. "But
I must regretfully decline--I am on my way to take the calculus test that
I missed last week."
"Oh, yeah, that's right." Duo snorted. "'Emergency mission' my ass--you'd
think the Preventers would know better than to call you in for relief
"Under normal circumstances, yes; but as Sally was out sick and I am
her second, despite the fact that I am available on a part-time
basis only, Une felt I would be best suited to the task."
"Yeah, but now you gotta make up the stupid test!" Duo blew a puff of
air through his bangs and mock-pouted. "What am I supposed to do with
all this time by myself, huh? Two whole hours with no one to annoy..."
Wufei was smiling again. "You think my willpower and self-control so minimal
that I am still annoyed by you after five years?" he teased as
they stopped at the end of the hall. His destination lay left, Duo's to
the right. "What makes you believe I don't simply ignore you?"
Duo flashed his trademark grin. "C'mon, Wu, I'm annoying as hell and you
know it." He winked.
~He is so terribly cute when he does that...~ Wufei ignored
the fleeting thought and let his smile deepen. "Very well--you are no
end of annoying, and I am delighted to have a laborious math test ahead
of me as opposed to the dreadful torture of your company."
Duo pouted again, silent laughter in his eyes. "Gee thanks, Wu. You're
not supposed to agree with me." He shook his head.
Wufei sighed, smile fading slightly. "Unfortunately, I must be off." He
gave Duo a quick once-over, one eyebrow raised loftily. "I trust you will
find something to entertain yourself in my absence?"
Duo grinned. "Oh, I'm sure I can come up with something," he drawled
"Something non-destructive and non-disruptive to our neighbors," Wufei
clarified. "Something where your extensive knowledge of explosives will
be of no use."
"Damn, 'Fei, take all the fun outta life why don'tcha." Still grinning,
Duo glanced at his watch. "You'd better get, if you don't wanna miss your
"Indeed." Wufei shifted his books. "I would be happy to 'hang out' with
you when I return."
"Cool. See you then!" Duo whirled and dashed off down the hall, braid
swirling and flapping half a second behind him.
Wufei lingered a moment longer, watching him go; then, with a sigh, he
turned and strode purposefully in the opposite direction.
Duo Maxwell was a distraction he could ill afford at the moment.
He had a test on which to focus.
Duo whisked impatiently through the cafeteria line, opting for some of
the more edible items and scowling darkly at others that were hard-pressed
to pass for food. Really, with the soaring cost of tuition and room &
board you'd think the university could at least provide some halfway-decent
grub. But then, it was after all a university; he supposed some things
would never change.
Paying for his lunch, he made his way to a small corner table by a window
that overlooked the admittedly scenic grounds between here and the dorms,
and his eyes wandered absently while he ate. There, that tree--it was
a lovely large thing covered in pale pink blossoms; its proper name escaped
him at the moment--that tree was the lucky one.
Wufei practiced his forms under that tree at precisely an hour past dawn
every day, which had surprised Duo at first. Really, though, it only made
sense for the boy to continue his training habits--just because they were
no longer pilots didn't mean Wufei would give up something that he'd been
doing for most of his life. Besides, he was still a part-time Preventer;
and every little bit of advantage helped.
Especially when you were as short as Wufei seemed destined to remain.
But back to the point--Duo was glad that Wufei still went through his
katas religiously. It meant that every morning, Duo could sneak out of
bed and peek at the window, watching unobserved what he was sure was one
of the most beautiful sights in creation--a half-naked Wufei engaged in
structured, flowing physical movement.
The boy was simply poetry in motion, making the rigorous exercises seem
effortless, everything about him absolutely flawless as he followed his
routine. And every day Duo watched, in envy and admiration, resigned to
the fact that his beautiful roommate was a dream that would never come
Duo sighed, glancing down at his empty tray. Enough of this. He spent
way too much time thinking about Wufei anyway. What he needed now
was something to entertain himself for the next couple hours while his
roommate was out...
He smiled suddenly, the expression decidedly wicked. Wufei was gone. This
was the perfect opportunity to take a look at that new video he'd picked
up last week...
Still grinning, Duo dumped his tray and headed for the dorms.
Wufei blew out a quiet but irritated breath as he breezed through the
test in front of him. This was ridiculously easy. All the studying he
had done last night had been needless, it seemed; and the professor's
admonitions to "take his time" went relatively unheeded. And while most
people would be happy to find a test so simple, Wufei was disappointed
at the lack of any appreciable academic challenge.
The test did not even require all of his attention, which meant that he
found himself pondering other issues as he worked, the most prominent
of which was this:
What ought he to do with his attraction to Duo?
It was a question he had been asking himself for months now; and though
his conclusion thus far had been "nothing", he found himself in constant
internal debate over the matter.
Duo, after all, was terribly confident in himself and his open sexuality;
he gave off a subtle aura of experience and talent that made Wufei feel
admittedly inadequate and decidedly inferior. What need would Duo have,
after all, of a still-closeted and barely-beyond-virginal boyfriend?
What was to say he would even be interested in Wufei? Just because he
was openly gay didn't mean he'd want every guy who crossed his path...
On the other hand, there had been scattered occasions when Wufei could
have sworn that Duo was cautiously flirting with him--brushing against
him often and repeatedly as they studied in silence side by side at the
big double desk, dropping some casually cheeky remark clearly intended
to make him blush, constant friendly teasing--other seemingly inconsequential
occurrences of the like. And while Wufei was developing a knack for teasing
in return, he often wondered if there was anything more to Duo's behavior.
Then again, Duo was an incorrigible flirt and a horrid tease, regardless
of his victim's gender. He delighted in making them blush, in making the
girls squeal and titter and the boys shift about uncomfortably in their
pants. What was to say his social habits didn't carry over every-so-often
to his interactions with Wufei?
Still, the fact remained that Duo was his friend--his closest friend,
no less--and he was reluctant to do anything that might seriously alter
that dynamic and end up hurting either one or both of them.
But there were nights when it was all he could do to keep to his own bed,
knowing that Duo slumbered only a short distance away, that hard wiry
body clad in nothing but boxers and black satin sheets, tempting, alluring,
silently beckoning Wufei to come wake him and claim him; there were mornings
when he lingered in the shower, imagining that the rivulets of water streaming
the length of his body were instead Duo's fingertips, Duo's hands, Duo's
mouth; that in another moment the gorgeous American would back him up
against the tiled wall and kiss him deeply, lift him, impale him, pump
him into a frenzy and follow him over the edge of paradise...
Wufei blinked, realizing abruptly that he was daydreaming, and hurried
through the final page of his test, mind still chasing circles over Duo.
He needed to do something, he realized. For his own sanity, his
own peace of mind, he needed to know if there was even the remote possibility
of something between himself and Duo.
He would have to devise a tactful way to find out. They were both mature
adults, after all; and even if Wufei's inquiry turned out horribly awkward,
there was no reason to think that they could not work past it. Their friendship
ran deep; he would simply have to trust in that and take this necessary
Someday soon, perhaps, when he could steel up his courage and court his
friend with carefully planned offerings and explanations...
The test was finished. Feeling oddly as though he'd accomplished more
for his personal life than his academic in the last hour, Wufei gathered
his books, turned in the exam, thanked the professor for his time, and
strode out the door.
He very likely had a terribly bored roommate waiting at home for him.
Somehow, the prospect made him smile.
Duo cursed at the unexpected sound of keys in the lock and quickly hit
the stop button on the remote. Rolling onto his stomach to hide the evidence
of what he'd been about to do, he plastered on a bright smile as Wufei
opened the door.
"Hey, 'Fei!" he greeted brightly as the Chinese boy entered their dorm
room. God, did he hafta walk in now? "Didn't expect ya home for
"Yes, well, the test was far simpler than I had anticipated," Wufei answered,
kicking the door closed behind him and hanging his keys on the hook.
Duo blew a puff of air through his bangs. "Tests are too damn easy for
you anyway," he returned.
"Hn. This is true." It was said with only the barest hint of smugness
in that lovely voice as Wufei dropped his books on the desk and ambled
over to Duo. "So, Maxwell, I see you found something to keep you occupied
in my absence after all--what life-enriching programs are you watching
today?" The tone was slightly sarcastic, lightly teasing; the value and
merits of television were a long-standing point of friendly contention
Duo shrugged. "Nothin', really..." Which was true. He couldn't say what
was on now--some soap opera from the look of it.
"Oh?" Wufei picked up the video cover lying atop the player; Duo winced
and dropped his forehead to his palm. ~Brilliant, Duo, just brilliant.
Leave it laying right out in plain sight where he can find it...~
He blushed hotly as Wufei read the title aloud.
"'Buff, Asian, and Gay'?" The Chinese boy put the cover down. "That's
a most interesting sort of nothing," he quipped, one eyebrow raised. ~And
a rather fortuitous revelation as well...~ "Was there something you
wanted to tell me?"
"Like what?" Duo said defensively, his face flaming. "You already know
I'm gay." This was really too embarrassing.
"Yes; but you never told me you prefer Asians," Wufei said silkily,
stressing the last word like it had some hidden significance.
The sound of that voice did odd things to Duo's already scattered composure
and he blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Well, of course
not! You think I want you going all jittery and defensive around me, like
I'm gonna try and molest you or something?"
Wufei's eyes widened innocently. "I would never," he asserted,
still in that silky teasing tone, one hand spread and pressed flat to
his chest. "I am hurt that you would think so little of me."
"That's not what I mean!" Duo was visibly flustered. "I mean, you learn
to be careful, being gay; and I--it's kind of embarrassing besides--"
"So you are embarrassed by the fact that you find Asians attractive?"
"No! I mean--you are one, and I...and...aw, forget it." His fair skin
was by now flushed a bright crimson.
Wufei smiled. "I see. Why Asians?"
"Huh?" Geez, why couldn't he just drop it?
"Why Asians, as opposed to some other ethnic group?"
"I...I don't know..." God, he smelled good today; it was horribly distracting.
"You people are just so damn sexy..."
"'We people'?" Wufei was clearly enjoying himself; but poor Duo didn't
find the situation all that amusing.
"I--dammit, Wu, I don't mean it like that--lemme alone already, will ya?"
"I am teasing, Duo," Wufei said gently; and much to Duo's surprise, he
sat down on the end of the American's bed instead of withdrawing to his
~Ohhh-kaaay...~ Duo was becoming thoroughly confused. Wufei was
clearly intent on keeping him off balance; and the Chinese boy wasn't
finished just yet.
He gestured at the screen, where the nameless soap opera was still playing.
"Turn it back on," he suggested softly.
~What the...?~ Duo gave him a Look, one eye squinted shut, the
other eyebrow raised into his bangs. "It's gay porn, Wu."
Wufei shrugged, the tiniest smile playing about his mouth. "Perhaps I
wish to broaden my horizons."
Duo's lips tightened into a thin line. ~Fine. If 'Fei wants to fuck
with me, I'll damn well give him exactly what he's asking for--see how
well he likes it then.~ He stabbed at the play button and the
video flashed onto the screen again.
Wufei leaned back just a little, one hand resting next to Duo's side;
Duo lay stiffly, still on his stomach and propped on his elbows, genuinely
uncomfortable to be watching such a thing with his straight friend but
determined as well that he would not be the one to back down from
this odd sort of challenge.
He stared intently at the screen, blood simmering as two tawny-skinned
black-haired men kissed sensually, writhing hotly one beneath the other
in obvious pleasure--whether genuine or faked for benefit of the camera,
it was still effectively beautiful.
Duo glanced away, doing his damnedest not to squirm. He really shouldn't
be watching anymore; he should be trying to relax and think un-sexy
thoughts to make this damned hard-on go down so he could get up from the
bed without revealing to Wufei exactly how much he liked Asians.
The fact that he was already terribly horny wasn't helping anything.
Neither was the fact that he was insanely attracted to Wufei.
~But who could blame me, really? I mean, just look at him!~ Duo
casually angled a glance to his left, where his vision was mostly filled
by Wufei's hip and thigh. ~He's just...so fucking sexy...and
he looks damn good in white...~
Wufei usually wore white, it seemed; be it the traditional garb of mourning
he'd donned faithfully throughout the war or the casual attire he sported
now--white jeans, not quite loose enough to disguise the bulge of his
thigh muscles; white silk shirt, unbuttoned and flowing liquidly over
the black tee that molded like a second skin to his upper body...
God, this was the worst kind of torture, Wufei sitting here next to him
more gorgeous than ever while the two Asians had sex on TV...the faint
scent of his cologne was driving Duo mad. Jesus, he smelled so
Duo nearly groaned aloud and turned his eyes back to the television. The
porno might be stimulating; but at the moment, it was safer than ogling
Wufei moved slightly beside him, and Duo frowned a little as he felt his
braid lifted. Wufei was...playing with his hair? Well, sure, it was nice;
but what the hell'd gotten in to the boy today?
"Have I ever told you," Wufei asked softly, "that your hair is very beautiful?"
"Ummmm, nnnnoo," Duo answered, distracted. He could feel Wufei coiling
the braid around one hand, moving it, laying it carefully over his shoulder;
it was oddly arousing and strangely unsettling at the same time. Wufei's
behavior was so out of character...
Duo nearly jumped out of his skin when Wufei's hand settled lightly on
his upper back and moved slowly lower along his spine. The touch made
him shiver, ever so slightly; he couldn't help glancing over at Wufei
He stared, eyes on a perfect level with his friend's lap.
That looked kinda like...was he hard? Damn, but it was difficult
to tell when a guy was sitting down in loose jeans! He glanced again at
the porno and back.
Was Wufei getting turned on by this?
Wasn't he supposed to be straight?
Duo shivered again as Wufei's gentle hand began its journey anew. Whatever
the Chinese boy thought he was doing, he had better just quit it. If he
was playing with Duo, teasing him, it damn sure wasn't very funny.
"Yes?" His voice was still soft, silky. Seductive, almost.
"What the hell are you doing?"